A writing post

So...Matt has his 1/2 day and has taken Ashley out to run errands with him, and Emily is napping, so I am taking advantage of the quiet time I have right now--it's so rare nowadays. I figured I'd stop to catch up on the happenings with the girls now.

Well, we will start with Emily. I'm not sure what constitutes as official "walking", but within the past few days she has opted to walk/take steps to things about 80% of the time. By Christmas she was taking up to 10 steps on her own. Now she still can/does, and can even walk across the room, and has been "walking" to different places that she wants to reach. So I think it counts....I still get a little nervous with the wobbly walking stage, although Emily is very graceful and good with balance. Even when she falls she usually falls gracefully 9 out of 10 times. So that is comforting since I can't always be around to soften the blow.

She has also begun climbing a lot. She likes to move chairs around the room (even our big kitchen chairs), and will also use her play chair to push against furniture and climb up on to reach things. She also loves to climb in and out of Ashley's big girl bed, and does a pretty good job about putting her feet down first to climb out without falling.

She is saying more words, babbling a lot, and pointing to things.

She is getting a few more teeth all at once, including some back molars. It's kind of reverted some of her eating--she was pretty much eating anything we were, but has settled on softer foods or even baby food again at times because her gums are so sore. It's also led to a constant runny nose and lots of poopy diapers...fun fun.

Despite her joy for walking, she still likes to be held/snuggled a lot. Sometimes she will literally hang off of my legs while I'm doing something, wanting to be held.

She also loves discovering things--she likes books with flaps that she can open, she loves to pull things apart and see how they work.

Emily also LOVES music and loves to dance or bop along to the tune. It's so cute to watch.

Ashley has been doing a FANTASTIC job with potty training. I think she's only had 2-3 accidents in total over the past few weeks. She's also really great about telling us when she needs to go. We check in throughout the day from time to time, and she'll usually say no she doesn't need to go. Then when she does, she will tell us. We even went to a friends house for a playdate, and she went and used the potty all by herself without even telling me. Haha. I'm really impressed and proud with how well she's been doing.

We've been through a transitional time with the new big girl bed. It's been a frustrating process at times. Prior to switching, Ashley slept until about 8 every morning. Now she's up very early, and the rare "sleeping in" is sleeping until 7. Also prior, Ashley's nap time has been 65% napping, 35% stay up and play/sing quietly in her crib. Now it's more like 50/50% which is still fine with me as long as she plays/reads quietly in her room.....BUT, Ashley doesn't want to stay in her room which is the problem. She is constantly in and out, claiming that she needs to use the potty (and when she does try, she does go almost all of the time). It's been a balancing act, because I don't want her having accidents since she's in regular underpants, but I also know she's totally abusing it, making herself go potty so she can keep going in and out of bed. We still do pull up underpants at night since she still occasionally wakes up wet, and I was half thinking of doing the same for nap time and saying that she needs to use the potty and get everything out before nap time (or not), but if she goes potty after that, she'll have to just sit and wait until bedroom time is over which doesn't feel too good. She will also open and shut her door multiple times, or even blatantly just walk out of her room and state that she is all done with quiet time.
 I have been doing lots of reading and researching on bedtime techniques that I hope will be effective, because it has been very stressful. I think it's so important for kids to have quiet/rest time even if they don't sleep...and quite frankly, mommy needs it. Matt works several LONG days where I'm basically a single mom from wake up time until bedtime. By nap time I am needing a break and some peace and quiet to either get things done for supper or around the house, or even just to sit and relax for a little bit. When I don't get it, I am more irritable and cranky with the girls which I don't want to be. I am even embarrassed to admit that I have lost my cool a few times and have yelled and made empty threats (which I know isn't good to do either). I try so hard to be calm, patient and loving. I don't want hurtful talk leaving bitter memories for my kids. So I am doing lots or reading to try to be proactive rather than reactive, and I am also being more selective with my nighttime "me time" so that I can use good coping tools to restore myself as much as possible for the next day. And I know this is just a phase....

Meal time is also difficult. I have seen firsthand how battling over food can lead to problems later on, and I am in the ED field and know not to make it about control. However, it is difficult finding a happy medium, and you read conflicting messages in the parent books. For instance, one book said how back in the day it was "you eat what is put in front of you or you don't eat", but that that's not necessarily good for kids, and that THAT can lead to ED/food issues, and that adults have lots of choices in what their eating, and kids should too. So let them pick what they eat, yet have other foods that you're eating readily available in case they want to try. Others still suggest the "give them what you're having" approach, and if they don't eat it then they will eat a big meal next time. After doing lots of research on it, I've come to a conclusion that I am happy with. I don't know if I agree with letting kids pick their own meals. I did try it with Ashley, and her pick is/would be Lucky Charms every day for every meal. However, I don't think it should be "take it or leave it" 100% either. So...I am going to do a combination. I'm going to let Ashley have choices and alternatives when picking foods (especially dinner which seems to be the hardest)--for example, would you like carrots or peas for dinner? Or chicken or fish for dinner? (Letting her have choices based on my selections). Then, I will serve her dinner based on that, and she could either choose to eat it (without counting bites, threats, or nagging), and will leave it on the table until a certain time, and if she doesn't eat it then she will have a big breakfast the next day. Matt and I are on the same page, and we're sticking to it!

Other than common battles for her age group, she is doing great otherwise. She is just learning and doing in leaps and bounds. We got this book for Christmas called "Where's Maddie?" with a dog that is posed on about 300 objects. I looked through it with Ashley, and I am just so impressed with her recall and all the objects that she can remember and identify. She knows so much.

She can also pull up memories from months and months ago, even up to a year ago probably. Same with discussions. For instance, one day we were in the car and I was going through body parts (mores for Emily since Ashley has known them for quite sometime). I was doing more challenging ones too. I had Ashley point to her forehead, which she did, and then she said how daddy had a boo boo on his forehead from the time he bumped his head on a fireplace when he was little. I was like "where the heck did that come from??" She had apparently heard the story and remembered it.
She can also remember all/most of the words to many songs. She can also distinguish which object is bigger/smaller, which one has more or less of something.

She is also LOVING dress up time and make believe/imagination stuff right now. I absolutely LOVE to watch/engage in it too. She got a few dress up clothes for Christmas, and she will switch from one to the next throughout the whole day. It's so cute. She will go from Cinderella, to Ariel the mermaid, to a superhero, to her animal masks. One day we took a walk on a "hiking trail" near our house, and she insisted on wearing her mouse mask (which she called Chucky Cheese). She also didn't want to wear her hood even though it was cold, because it would mess up her role. It was so cute watching her. Everyone walking by would smile at her. Sometimes she'd even go up to people and say "hi, I'm Chucky Cheese". It was just so cute.

I tell ya, she is at that age that can make a parent feel bipolar at times....She can bring you the greatest joy, love and laughter with all the adorable things she does; as well as bring the greatest frustration with (normal) developmental stuff for her age--all within a two minute time frame at times. Haha. But even despite the frustrating moments, I wouldn't change any of it and love this journey.

I am sure that there is much more about both girls, but my recall is pretty lousy at the moment.