Sunday, July 9, 2017

Now a kid update

It's been a while since I updated about the kids....

Well, it's crazy, but the school year is nearing it's end. Ashley is almost done with kindergarten. She has done a fantastic job. She's very advanced in her reading level, and is already reading chapter books. She can sound out most words, and even her attempts to spell them on her own are pretty good. She is adding, subtracting, etc. Her teacher has had nothing but good things to say about Ashley as a student.
Emily is doing great in school. She's able to identify all her letters and colors, can you tell her address and phone number, she can identify which picture is different out of a group, and can trace her name/letters very well (and can even write her name by herself). When I drop her off in the morning, all the kids (and even teachers) greet her with a warm hello. I got to go on a class trip with her a couple months back, and it was so fun to see her in her own element without her sister. She really was such a happy, confident little girl who has many friends.

Both girls are really into mastery right now. Working to improve or master different things. For instance, Ashley recently learned how to ride a two-wheel bike. She probably would have been ready sooner, but didn't get much practicing time with cold weather for months. Anyway, Grandmom had googled how to learn to ride a 2 wheeler, and they suggested that you take the pedals off the bike, and let the kids practice balancing/coasting while balancing for a little while. Once they get the hang of balance, put the pedals back on and try riding. Ashley picked it up in one day, and now already is riding so fast and well!!! She loves to practice.
Much to my surprise (but not really knowing Emily), Emily also just learned to ride a two wheeler! I had no idea 4 year olds were even capable of it!!! She is very coordinated and athletically inclined so it's not surprising. When we took Ashley's pedals off, we asked Emily if she wanted hers off too to practice balancing. She did. We left her pedals off for a week or so. She was getting quite quite good at balancing and coasting. I asked if she wanted to put the pedals back on and try riding with two wheels too. At first she said no, but then she said yes. She needs a little help starting off, but then she can do it!
Another thing that amazed me was this obstacle course we did. We went to this big mall that has a 3 story rope climbing/balance beam/obstacle course type thing to do as a family. I have always been, in psychology terms, a "high fear-avoidant" personality...aka, I avoid dangerous/risky/scary things. As I've gotten older, I've built up confidence and push myself to do things because I don't want to miss out on life and fun things. But there is NO WAY I'd EVER do that as a kid. But my kids did it (we all did as a family). I was totally amazed and proud. Emily is very much like Matt, and the complete opposite psychology term. They are fearless basically. Ashley used to be quite cautious, much like I am, but as she has gotten older she has become braver, and a really good balance--still careful/cautious at times but brave and daring at other times.
 I take some credit for their bravery. When I was a kid, my dad would really push us and almost force us to do things, and also talk sharply if we did something wrong (I'm sure out of good intentions), but would make me scared and feel unsafe in situations which increased the fear. We do not do that. Matt is fantastic--I wished I had had a dad like him sometimes. He does push them a little out of their comfort zones, but will respect the answer no if they don't want to. And if they do say yes, he is gentle, patient, and will show and take them step by step through the process. I also step in, and if they say no, I also say no. I encourage and support through action and words, but respect the answer no. So as a result, I think the girls feel safe and confident to try things, while also knowing that we will respect them and their decision if they really don't want to do something. With that reassurance, and their own inner voice of confidence, they really do fantastic.
The girls are also wrapping up karate. They really enjoyed doing that. We may return to it in the fall. Emily just signed up for gymnastics. She and Ashley (but mostly Emily) have been doing lots of flips on the playground, on our mini trampoline, they've been doing cartwheels, etc. She has been ready and wanting to do karate for a while. She just went to her first lesson and loved it.  We will see where that takes her.
Now that the weather is somewhat warmer (it has taken it's sweet old time this year, and lots of rain), we have played outside as much as possible. We stay at the school playground for about an hour after school a lot of days, then play on our swings and in our backyard a lot. Ashley has also mastered the monkey bars at school, and also enjoys doing crazy flips.
The girls have also entered the older-siblings type of relationship. Sometimes they are soooo incredibly sweet together. They can play so nicely together, and give each other sweet hugs. Ashley has done things like cover Emily's heart with her hand, to "protect her heart" while watching a show that she thought was too scary (aww). Then other times they fight and (Ashley) screams, they hurt each others feelings, etc. They are figuring out communication and problem solving (I've been trying to stay out of a lot of it and to let them figure it out, although it is hard to do when the fighting can drive you mad). Ashley can also be a bit competitive at times. Not sure if that is typical sibling rivalry, or part of her personality (she does have some issues with perfectionism and comparing with others...we're working on it).  Overall though, they do quite well.
They are both very sweet and thoughtful girls though. The other morning I got out of bed, and my slippers were sitting neatly right in front of me on the floor. Emily told me that she put them out for me so that my feet wouldn't get cold. How sweet is that??? She is very thoughtful and kind always.
Ashley also can be very sweet. We went to a party where a girl got sick and was upset. Ashley went over and totally empathized and validated her feelings. Maybe she'll be a counselor too someday ;)

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