I like to have a more proactive approach to life, and to my marriage and parenting, so rather than letting problems build and build and dealing with a bigger clean up later, I like to stay on top of things and see what I can do now in the current moment. I am also so grateful and LOVE that I am married to a man who is also wanting and willing to learn more, and open to watching videos or read about marriage and child rearing too. I look at it like this: in our careers we are encouraged and even sometimes expected to continue learning and doing continuing education so that we stay up to date with the latest and greatest techniques and approaches so we are on top of the game with things. We don't go into our careers and say "I'm doing a "good enough" job, or "eh, I went to school. What I learned there will be enough to carry me through years and years in my practice". That would be doing a great disservice to our clients, and is almost downright neglectful. So why would I use this approach with my family--my husband and children whom I love most? I want to learn and grow and be my best so that when I die and they're at my funeral, they can talk about the kind of legacy I left behind, which I hope and pray and try my hardest to be a loving one.
So anyway, Matt, Lisa, Bruce and I all sat down and watched this video. In the first two minutes, I immediately felt a sense of relief. The kids were ALL doing the same behaviors that Ashley has been. I was also encouraged to see that we were using the right kind of approaches and techniques to handling them, although I did pick up a few pointers which I've applied and already see differences.
The video also described this as "the first adolescence" where the children are trying to separate from parents and take on more on their own. I think this was a good reminder for me--with the chaos of life, between shopping and preparing for the new house, a "new baby", a three-five month thrown off schedule and time of constant transitions, I sometimes try to get things done quick and easy, and it was a good reminder to have Ashley participate in the helping process more and doing more for herself (which she does love) by picking out her own outfits, helping to cook and clean up, helping to feed Emily more often, etc.
It was also a good reminder to hear that these behaviors are not your children, it's just a healthy and natural part of their development and it doesn't last forever.
I am glad that Ashley is healthy and well...and even with some trying moments, she is such an amazing little girl.
Cute things I've noticed with her more lately:
She is getting quite the imagination over the past couple of months, playing more make believe, worrying about monsters, mimicking behaviors she's watched us do, etc. For instance, we went peach picking over the weekend. I made peach cobbler. Ashely had watched me take it out of the oven using oven mitts, so the next morning she needed those oven mitts while she cooked in her toy kitchen. Lol.
She also loves to sing and dance, and put on shows for us/Emily. She now likes to be center stage, and will say "no mommy, no" if I try to chime in.
She is a human sponge, wanting to soak up as much about this earth as she can. I love watching her learn and explore.
She is surprisingly outgoing for her age. The video was explaining that at this age, children play around each other but don't really interact with one another. Ashley does do that about 60% of the time, but she also loves to go up to kids and say hi, give them hugs, and tries to play with them. She is also compassionate--for instance, one day while we were at the library class there was a boy who was upset. Ashley walked up to him and held his hand and tried to comfort him. His mom and I both thought she was so sweet.
Emily is doing good too. She is really turning into quite a person too. Now that she has really discovered her "voice", she is attempting to say more words, and mimics people. She squeals, sings, grunts, etc. She's hysterical. She also has started "demanding" food when I'm feeding her solids, so I'm trying to teach her the sign for "more".
She can also hold herself up standing/leaning against a table for a few seconds.
She gets around with her rolling (still not a big interest in crawling) and is into EVERYTHING!!!! Perfect timing with our move. Lol. She is THE SQUIRMIEST baby I've seen when it comes to diaper changing (and I've known a lot after working at a daycare and lots of babysitting). She doesn't want to sit still for ANYTHING.
She's eating more varieties of food--rice and oatmeal, a variety of fruits and veggies, yogurt melts and I just introduced cottage cheese. She still has issues with gagging a little which I think I may bring up at her next appointment. I had saved Ashley's old feeding schedule based on instructions from old pediatrician, and Ashley had no issues with cottage cheese or slightly chunky foods by this point. Emily was kind of choking again when I gave it to her..grr..
Our days have been full of fun...We've done TONS of parks/playgrounds, we've done a slip and slide/mini pool thing that we had bought that we keep at Andrew and Lauren's for now, we went peach picking, trips to bounce houses and trips to library and class, playing out in our makeshift sandbox, etc. We haven't had a lack of a yard and house stop us from living life.
Speaking of house, TOMORROW IS THE BIG DAY!!! YAY!!! We close on our house! I'm so excited. It seemed like it was never going to happen, between the first house falling through, then back to the drawing board with searching, then this house's close date being pushed back, etc. But it is here!!!
I am absolutely dreading the moving part, and unpacking all the boxes and organizing and setting up...but at the same time I am thrilled about having my things back, having my own home again, and I can't wait to make it "ours". The only frustrating thing for me is that I love decorating/home interior stuff. It's one of my hobbies/passions, BUT we are going to be very very house poor and very tight on money for a while, and I also have two young children who still need my love and attention. So unfortunately I can't jump in and make it "mine" right away like I'd like. We'll do a little here and there when we have the time and money. But we are at least doing the things I really wanted to start with--getting the bedrooms ready and "like home". We are having a painting party on Saturday and painting all the bedrooms, hanging new light fixtures/fans, and replacing the carpeting. Maybe even taking down some wallpaper. Then the rest we will do a little bit here and there. No rush. I'm going to just take it one box at a time...although I say that, but will prob try to get it as homey as possible with decorating until we can do other projects :)
Well I'm not sure when I'll be on next since we're going to have a busy week or two ahead, so I will talk to you soon from "home" next.
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